Dear FutureMe,
Alrighty then, let's get this started! First thing's first, breathe and take a moment relax your shoulders- you never did learn to relax. I'm very sure that by now things have kinda hit the fan for you, but that's ok. You have always just kinda been in the middle of wars in that way, everyone close to you found a way to give you a new scar- they always forget how resilient you are, though- you're such a fast healer.
Whether you just had a nasty fight with your- awful- grandparents, or the move is going down, or you simply reached your limit and broke down in some way, it's okay. It's not your fault that your grandparents always push you to such extremities, it's not your fault that they won't listen and you have to leave (but I'm sure you'll find a way to stay in school), and it's most certainly not your fault that things became too much. For as long as I have known you, you've always held such immense guilt over everything, regardless if it was even remotely connected to you. So let go of that.
I know how emotionally independent you've had to be- your grandparents (or parents for that matter) never supported you. But every time someone's even a tiny bit off you jump to help and comfort no matter what, but every time you need support, you push everyone away. So stop that, call Breann, or Len, or anyone else, they will support you, and no- stop that, I already know your saying you're not worth it- you are worth so much more than everything you've received. You aren't a burden, or an exception, you need comfort, so make plans, stay in touch, call and text people!
Like I said earlier, everyone who's been your family has scarred you, hurt you, and beat you down. But above all else, you are resilient and strong- yes it takes strength to let down your wall and pour your eyes out and sob- every single time you bounced back and your smile never waned. Remember Allena? A faux mother who did nothing but abuse you? Carley? Skye having to leave us?
You can do it.
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