A letter from March 26th, 2020

Dear FutureMe, It's the middle of the pandemic right now (26th March 2020) and you are 4 weeks out of surgery. It still hurts to bend your knee and you haven't been cleared to walk yet. Every day you get up around 8am and you feel quite tired. This is a really hard time in your life, though admittedly, not as hard as last year. Nutrition is a struggle - late night snacking (right before bed) has been hard for you. Eating too quickly and too much is also a struggle for you. It's been hard and easy in isolation.In some ways, being alone is pretty nice because it's easy on your knee. But doing all work from the computer is quickly draining. That being said, it definitely feels nice not to have too much pressure to do anything. In a year, I hope that I am back to exercising how I was. I hope I have used the barbell medicine template to get myself back to where I was (and stronger - my last squat was 120kg). I hope I feel lively and healthy. The food thing is SO difficult right now. I hope you're not still worrying about that. I hope you've been able to slow down while you eat and really focus on the things that you are experiencing while eating. I hope you don't feel guilty for having meals or feel sad about having snacks. I hope you no longer wake up with the size of your body and your belly as the first thing on your mind. I hope that you don't hate yourself every single waking moment of every day. I hope you feel fit and beautiful and capable. I love you.