A letter from September 8th, 2020

Dear FutureMe, happy birthday!!!! you’re 18 now! (i hope so, inshallah!) im gonna remind you of 16 year old me rn, so wait until the end for me to actually talk to you*. well you’re supposed to be a junior cause you failed but it’s okay you’re working on it. it’s luna & danas bday rn and you talked to the two seniors in the library that seem really cool haha, you said that they remind you of “those two really good friends in the early 2000s when everything was easier” and they laughed and was like yeah well we’re tryna make it better w everything going on rn. your mom also just called unexpectedly to see what sushi you want haha. your brother is also going to publish a book!! so far atm, you’re kind of confused w how everything is playing out in your life, you’re going w the flow and seeing where the flow takes you, however, you also realized atm that your inner child isn’t healed, and there’s a certain void that’s not yet been filled. you are definitely trying to gain more strength in everything you do, you always think about how amazing things would be if you had a better connection w your cousins. also, you just finished writing a song called “Lonely Girls”! your favorite line of your song is, “two lonely girls w two different lives, the wind could feel our frights.... etc... we got caught but we made it out alive.. farewell goodbye.” the song is about you actually and someone else in another world that you wish to run away w to seek peace, though, you both are two lonely girls, during that moment, you guys had eachother and didn’t feel as lonely anymore, but it was just a girl you met, not anyone you know personally, you loved the idea of immediately connecting w someone that you don’t even know, the spark is there, you two just need to connect, platonically. as of rn, you’re not on speaking terms w a certain individual, you feel uncomfortable because you had no bad intentions, you feel uncomfortable because before it happened, you kind of showed your vulnerability, and you don’t like doing that so now you’re kind of embarrassed but you think that it’s necessary to have people come into your life and you let them know how you feel and teach them something maybe along the way, even if the relationship expires too soon. w everything going on, you’re trying to figure out what god is doing rn. you’re always thinking about life after highschool and making money, being independent and also then later in marrying the right guy who you hope can complete half of your deen as you do the same for him. you feel like half of the people you’re w now, aren’t going to be in your life in the future but you don’t stress it, you’re just enjoying the moment. “moments don’t last 4ever, but those moments effect you 4ever.” as of rn, your motto is, “the world is yours, so make it a world worth living.” you’ve matured a lot from your early years, right now, you’re wondering how much more are you gonna mature especially when you turn 18!!!! so rn, you gotta go cause you’re sleepy BUT, 18 year old you, answer these questions! 1. how has life been in the past year & 7 months? has it gotten better or worse or just there? 2. are you happier now? what are your greatest moments? 3. how do you feel about highschool now? what school are you in? 4. what’s the biggest thing you realized this year? 5. who do you love rn and what do you love rn? 6. did you make new friends? are you still w the same ones? 7. how’s your relationship like w god, family and your body? including friendships too. 8. are certain voids filled? 9. what are you doing for your birthday today? 10. who called to tell you happy birthday and meant it? well that’s all for today future me! i hope you found happiness and better individuals! i love you! see you in a year and 7 months! goodbye <3