A letter from November 9th, 2020

Dear FutureMe, Today is a bad day for some unknown reason. We aren't trained so I can only assume that now everything has settled. Now everything has been resolved. What's left? Maybe I'm trying to find out who I am but failing miserably. I write this in the hope that a year from now is better. A year from now you aren't questioning, what's next? What do I do now? What is the purpose of my life. I hope that a year from now you are doing something that gives you purpose, that makes you happy. I've come to realise that the salary isn't everything. Sure the debt isn't there anymore but looking back, was life more exciting then? Was life more fulfilling then? Somewhere deep down, I think the answer is yes. So then why would positive things make a world of difference? I don't know. Maybe you will when you read this. Maybe everything will be different. Maybe you'll be in love. With someone new. Maybe Connor will be in love too and maybe that love will give you the closure you need. I don't write this feeling that I haven't moved on because I know I have but moved on to what exactly? I don't know. Ken died recently so when you read this, message Elkie. Message Glen. Send them your love. Lord knows they'll need it. Hopefully you are getting closer to buying a house. Wouldn't it be perfect if you were reading this in your new home? I can only hope that happens for us. Or for you when you read this. I'm not sure me as is will still be a thing in a years time. I hope not. Hopefully by 29 you'll have it all figured out. If not, you better make sure 30 year old us has. Okay? I really hope the world is kind to you. Is better to you. And in return, you to it. Because right now, I don't think we are at an understanding. The world has been so dark the past two years, with very little light shining through. But eventually it will get better. It has to. Right? I guess you'll make the judgement when you read this. How did the release go? I hope there were multiple. Until next time, A