A letter from January 23rd, 2015

Dear FutureMe, Sitting in your new apartment, looking outside the porch, watching the whole horizon of east dallas, drinking hot chocolate with raisin bread and peanut butter. You seem calm and content right now but deep inside your thoughts, you are full of fear, anxiety, doubts... Can I keep up with this new job, new people, new environnent, new way of life? Am I strong enough? Can I hold myself together and just survive? I hope the 36 year-old future me is smiling, even laughing at how silly nervous i am right now about my life and career. Have you met a good guy yet? Are you still a virgin? If yes, this is the right time to buy a guy... Seriously, I hope you're truly happy. I hope you finally learned how to live without inhibitions, love deeply, speak your mind, and become effectively assertive... I hope you finally learn how to pole dance (even if it's just inside your room). I hope that you are healthy, eating healthy, practicing yoga... i hope that you are driving your own car.. an audi? I hope that you told your mom that you love her. I hope that you are smiling and crying at the same time at this moment... I hope that you are joyful.